When you’re trapped in an abusive relationship, it can take every last shred of courage left in you to leave everything behind and move on. If Reese Witherspoon hadn’t done it when she was young, she may never have turned into the woman that she is today.
During an interview with Oprah Winfrey’s O Magazine, Witherspoon was asked, “What’s the most difficult decision you’ve had to make to fulfill your destiny?” according to Grazia. “For me, probably leaving an abusive relationship,’ Reese reveals, before explaining that the abuse was both ‘psychological’ and ’emotional’,” she said, bravely opening up about her toxic relationship.
“A line got drawn in the sand and it got crossed, and my brain just switched,” the actress went on to say. “I knew it was going to be very difficult but I just couldn’t go any further. But it was profound and I was young.”
“It changed who I was on a cellular level, the fact that I stood up for myself,” she said and talked about how the choice to leave a manipulative relationship can be “wrought with self-doubt, particularly if someone damages your self-esteem.”
All the wonderful things that Reese Witherspoon is admired for today, the toxic partner in her life tried to take it away from her. Witherspoon never named the person, but she also added, “People say to me that knew me then, ‘You’re a completely different person’. I didn’t have self-esteem. I’m a different person now and it’s part of the reason I can stand up and say, ‘Yes, I’m ambitious.’ Because someone tried to take that from me.”
Her ambition and talent eventually turned her life around, making her a praised name in Hollywood. But it took her time to find the right man in her life. After her marriage with Ryan Phillippe came to an end and after her public breakup with Jake Gyllenhaal, things also started to work until Jim Toth, a Hollywood talent agent walked into her life.
They met by chance at a party where Toth saved her from an awkward situation. “It happened out of the blue. This really drunk guy was hitting on me, making such an idiot of himself, yelling at me,” the Oscar-winning actress told Elle. “He was like, [slurring, scowling, pointing finger in her face] ‘You don’t know me.’ And I was like, ‘Yeah, I know. I don’t know you!’ Jim came over and said, ‘Please excuse my friend. He’s just broken up with someone.’ Jim was a really good friend, pulling him out of that situation. That’s just kind of who he is, a really good person.”
In January, 2010, they started dating and with time, the new man in her life showed her how much love the right partner can fill her life with. She sometimes wondered if she would ever remarry again. She recalled a “Jim said, ‘I’m gonna show you every day what a good partner is, what a good person is. I’m going to take care of you. I’m gonna do this so much that you’re gonna get used to it.’ I was like, ‘What are you talking about?’ I’ve never had anybody like that in my life.”
Having found a mature man, ready to give her the relationship she deserved, Witherspoon was ready to walk down the aisle once again. The pair got married in March, 2011 at the actress’s estate, as reported by Country Living.
When she talked about what she loves about her husband, she described him to People as “an incredible man, a wonderful organizer, a great leader. He knows how to get people together. He’s very patient and funny with the kids. And he really encourages them to see the humor in life.”
Apart from being the husband that she needed, he’s also a great father to their son, Tennessee, and to her children, Ava and Deacon from her previous marriage.
Her ideal date night with him would be “Going to a nice dinner and not having to wake up at the crack of dawn with the kids. That’s nice.”
After a manipulative relationship and emotional breakups, Witherspoon finally has someone by her side who “keeps me smiling everyday!”