“Genuine and true love is so rare that when you encounter it in any form, it’s a wonderful thing, to be utterly cherished in whatever form it takes.” – Gwendoline Christie
We all talk about love, and how we felt it at one point in time in our lives, but how exactly is love defined?
According to scientist, psychologist and author Todd B. Kashdan, PhD, “Love is about an expansion of the self whereby another person’s interests, values, social network, and finances become part of your life just as you share your resources with them. Love does not mean that you give up everything for another person. Rather, you possess sufficient trust to give them the keys to everything that you can access.”
Getting that special someone’s attention can be difficult. You want to show him that you’re everything he’s ever wanted, but how? Actresses from romantic comedies have been doing it for ages, but translating that into the real world isn’t quite the same. There are some important things to remember when you’re looking to get a guy to fall in love with you. If you follow the right steps, you’re bound to succeed.
HERE ARE 15 WAYS TO MAKE A MAN FALL HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH YOU
1. BE YOURSELF
Clinical psychologist Merry Lin writes in her book ‘The Fully Lived Life’, “Faking your way through life is believing that if you let people know the real you, they won’t like you. The tapes that play in your head say that if people really knew what was going on inside you, they would lose respect for you. While you play those roles, juggling those masks you have to wear and hiding your pain … the pressure increases to keep pretending you have it all together.”
Therefore, none of this will work if you’re pretending to be someone you’re not! You want the guy to fall in love with you, not someone you’re pretending to be. So, ditch your Sandra Dee from the end of Grease persona and just be who you are.
2. LOOK YOUR BEST
You don’t have to go on a diet and change your hair to look your best. All you have to do is maximize your best features and make sure that you look as good as possible. Your beauty is unique, and doesn’t need any changes.
Having good communication skills is about more than being able to communicate effectively. It’s also about being able to actively listen.
Writer and journalist Irma Kurtz says, “No matter how bad things are, give your partner a chance to speak. We tend to jump in with an opinion before we’ve heard each other out. Don’t scream, keep your cool: it makes a big difference. So often, things can be resolved by learning to listen.”
Men have a lot to say, and when you show that you can listen, they’ll be more inclined to say the things that matter.
It’s proven that laughter is contagious. So, when you’re laughing, you’re setting off chemicals in a guy’s brain to feel good. It can be totally addictive. If you’re trying to attract a guy, then laughter is the best way to draw him in and keep him wanting more.
5. GOOD ATTITUDE
People with poor attitudes are often extremely negative people and not fun to be around. Having a good attitude about things, especially when things might not be going right for you, is extremely attractive and charming. A guy is going to be drawn to your ability to stay positive.
“Plus, by taking care of what you need to in your own life, you bring a more positive attitude back into the relationship. The other person will start to treat you differently—without you having done anything other than shift your energy into your own life,” says wellness coach and author, Susan Biali.
6. BE SWEET
Everyone has the ability to be a little mean – but there’s no reason to be! Turn off the part of your brain that wants to be catty and try being kind instead. Any guy will find that attractive. After all, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.
If you want a guy to fall in love with you, then you need to show him that you’re into him too! The best way is to flirt with him.
“When it comes down to it, flirting is a mindset. It is saying to yourself, “I like them! I want to make them feel good by being nice, complimenting and letting them know that I like them.” You can twirl your hair, but if you are not projecting warmth or even looking at them in the eye, it doesn’t count,” says relationship expert and television host Rachel DeAlto.
Guys will be drawn to girls that they know are already attracted to them. Plus, flirting is a fun way to be intimate with someone.
8. BE DIFFERENT
Being yourself is a great way to be different. It may seem like guys all like the same type of girl, but that isn’t true. If you allow yourself to be different and swim upstream rather than go with the societal flow, worthy guys will notice. And, they’ll fall in love with all of your unique differences.
9. BE WITTY
You don’t have to go along with everything he says and agree with him. It’s okay to have a few friendly debates and challenge one another – and being able to be witty and thinking quickly about your views will make him fall even more in love with you.
10. GET PHYSICAL
Guys don’t always have to be the ones who initiate physical contact. In fact, a lot of guys love it when a woman wraps her arms around him, or leans in for a kiss first.
“Many times people become increasingly shy with the person they love the more time goes by. Keep your ‘sex esteem’ alive by keeping up certain practices on a regular basis. This allows you to remain vibrant, sexy, and engaged in your love life,” says licensed individual, couples, and sex therapist Sari Cooper, LCSW.
Initiate the physical contact and he’ll be left wanting more.
11. DON’T SMOTHER HIM
It might be tempting to want to spend every waking moment with him, but remember that everyone needs alone time. Giving a guy the freedom to be himself will make sure that he’s always coming back to you in the end. If you prove that you’re not the type to get clingy, he’ll know you’re the right one.
12. LET HIM CALL YOU
If you want to talk to him or need to tell him something, calling him is totally fine! It’s normal! But sometimes, a guy needs to feel like he’s the one making the first move. So even if you’re dying to pick up the phone, let him come to you. He’ll be delighted by how happy you are to hear from him and fall even more in love.
13. MAKE EYE CONTACT
Eye contact is already proven to be one of the most effective body language techniques there is.
“Eye contact and a smile are all it takes! Three to four seconds of eye contact, plus a smile and you are golden. Most guys like to hedge their bets of being shot down, and those nonverbal cues let him know the odds are in his favor,” adds DeAlto.
If you’re trying to get a guy to fall for you, make sure you’re giving him a lot of eye contact. He’ll feel more and more connected to you while you get to know one another more.
14. DON’T BE DESPERATE
Chill! Relax! Don’t feel like your whole life is hinging in this relationship. Make sure that you have your own support network and hobbies. Being with a guy is amazing, and building a relationship together is phenomenal. But if you appear too desperate, it’s going to turn him off of the relationship entirely.
15. BE TRUSTWORTHY
When a guy is falling in love, he’s going to tell you a lot of his insecurities.
According to love and marriage experts Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz, “Trust is not something all loving relationships start with… But one thing is for sure; happy and successful marriages and relationships survive and thrive on the basis of this trust. Trust is so pervasive in their relationship that they never give it a second thought. They expect it. It’s always there. It is part of the fabric of their relationship.”
Be a trustworthy partner and keep his secrets safe. If he can trust you, he’ll fall in love with you no problem.
Getting a guy to fall in love with you is more about being yourself and showing positive qualities, than any kind of gimmick. As long as you make sure that you’re being a good and kind human being, and guy of your choice will fall for you.