It’s a story as old as time – two people meet and fall in love, but one person decides they need time to figure out exactly what they want. Whether it’s focusing on their career, working through personal issues, or figuring out whether or not they want to start a family, the outcome is often the same. They decide to make their partner wait while they try to sort through their issues.
The problem with this is that everyone has a breaking point. Some people will wait longer than others, but eventually even the most loyal, patient people will get tired of being an afterthought. Being put second in someone’s life and being made into less of a priority always stings. It’s only a matter of time before the person being made to wait realises they deserve someone who will put them first. Not even love is strong enough to bridge the distance that comes with being made second choice.
Being kept in the twilight zone that exists somewhere between committing to the relationship and breaking up is an exhausting experience. It means spending time and energy on a person who you’re not even sure wants you in their life anymore.
You can’t keep someone waiting indefinitely while you figure things out. It’s unfair to expect them to wait when you have no idea how long it will take you to work through your problems.
Either commit to the relationship or turn them loose – whatever you decide to do, it’s important to follow through with your decision. Keeping someone in the gray area almost always leads to prolonged hurt and heartbreak. Keep them waiting, and there’s a very good chance that they’ll end up making the decision for you.