We all want to be interesting. You want to be the kind of person that everyone wants to spend time with or hang out with. Great people would surround you, and you’d feel secure in the knowledge that you can keep them around easily just because of your personality!
But that’s all much easier said than done. Being appealing doesn’t come naturally. Yes, you’re a unique individual all on your own, and those you care about probably already consider you interesting, but being perceived as attractive by others relies heavily on your ability to convince others that you are worth listening to.
So how can you become a fascinating person? What can you do to make others enjoy your company more? The answers might surprise you, and they’re pretty simple steps to do on your own!
HERE ARE 7 WAYS TO BE MORE INTERESTING
1. BECOME A BETTER LISTENER
People often don’t spend enough time listening. You may wonder why you have to hear what others say to be interesting. But the truth is that some of the most interesting people you’ll ever meet don’t talk nearly as much as they listen. Here’s why:
Those who listen well tend to retain more interesting nuggets of information
They don’t wind up rambling or boring people by dominating conversations
People love to talk about themselves; when you allow them to do so, they will find you more interesting because they get to talk about what they love
Being a good listener is one of the hallmark positive traits of a likable person. But how can you hone your listening skills? Here are a few ideas: (1)
Ask questions and genuinely listen to the answers
Learn to create curiosity in other people’s lives and ask them about their days, hobbies, and other topics
Genuinely take an interest in the other person’s talking points
Consider the possibility that you can learn something new by listening to different people
2. LEARN NEW THINGS
A new year comes, but you’re still the old you. Nothing’s changed in your life for a long time. You do the same stuff and stick to what you know. It’s safe, sure, but it’s also ridiculously dull.
Learning new things gives you new skills, hobbies, and experiences to talk about. It also gives you new ideas to have in common with other people. Combined, this allows you to be much more interesting! Here are some tips.
SEEK OUT TOPICS THAT ARE NOT CAREER-RELATED
It’s easy to fall into the trap of only ever pursuing subjects and areas that are related to your work. Unfortunately, this can get you stuck in just one set of skills, preventing you from progressing and finding a life outside of your work.
Find things that interest you and see if you can turn them into hobbies. Not sure what to do? Look up nearby events and give something a try, even if you’ve never done it before. You never know – you might find your new favorite pastime!
READ NEW BOOKS
Reading books is how we expand our horizons. Make it a point to read new books regularly. Read about different subjects, issues, and topics, and read books in all sorts of different genres. Slowly, you’ll absorb the information you’re engrossed in, and it’ll make you much more enjoyable.
SATISFY YOUR CURIOSITY
Curiosity is a natural human emotion, and yet so many of us repress it. The next time you feel curious about something, ask about it or look it up. Immerse yourself in the world by finding out about something that’s brand new to you.
LEARN A NEW SKILL EACH MONTH
If your skills never change or evolve, you become very dull. What else is there to talk about if you only do the same things again and again?
Every month, make it a goal to learn something new. It can be something as simple as figuring out how to cook in a new way or as complex as teaching yourself to play an instrument. Even if you end up not keeping it up, you’ll have a little bit of experience to joke and talk about later.
3. LEARN HOW TO TELL A COMPELLING STORY
You could have the coolest life experiences in the world, but if you tell monotonous, uninteresting stories, those experiences will just put others to sleep. That’s why you need to learn to tell good, compelling stories. That way, even the most standard daily life tales can become hilarious and fascinating.
Why is storytelling so integral to human culture? Well, narrative psychology indicates that humans naturally observe and pay attention to stories more than analytical statements. Essentially, the people around you are more likely to respond in a positive way to stories that you tell. (2)
The trick, then, is learning how to share them in the best way possible! Here are some tips to help you do so:
Ground your audience by setting the stage so they can keep up
A central conflict to a story keeps an audience interested
Remove certain mundane details
Don’t overdo your embellishment; a good story is a believable one
Make sure your tales aren’t overly convoluted
Use body language to emphasize the story and keep everyone engaged
Speak expressively and with good rhythm or intonation; don’t just drone on
Your tale needs a proper resolution; don’t just end it awkwardly, find some type of message or lesson to be taken from it
Prepare three stories from your life that you know are engaging and can be told again and again to different people with ease
Uniquely tailor your stories to your audience; figure out which type of story your current audience would like best and appeal to those preferences
4. LEARN SOME JOKE-TELLING SKILLS
Alright, now you can tell stories – but can you tell jokes? A story without a couple of laughs thrown in can get pretty dry. Besides, you don’t need to be telling a tale to show your funny side.
Humor often makes people much more interesting very quickly. Studies have also found that humor can make others view you in a more positive light. It makes you likable, and it shows those around you that you’re fun and easygoing. Here are some tips to tell better jokes: (3)
Watch comedy shows, especially standup comedy
Figure out which jokes you’re good at sharing and add them to your repertoire of go-to’s
Learn how to tell jokes in an engaging way
Listen to podcasts
Make sure you deliver your punchlines with that named punch in it!
Learn about improvisation, and take an improv class if you’re up for it
5. GIVE IN TO YOUR WEIRD SIDE
Everyone’s got a weird side. It’s what makes them unique. Most of us are taught to hold it back. But suppressing it isn’t just unhealthy and harmful to positive thinking – it also ruins a lot of what could make you enjoyable.
Fitting in is highly overrated, but it can be difficult to unlearn the desire to match standard conventions. That’s why learning to say “yes” to those more unusual parts of you can take a while. It’s worth it, though, as it’s those quirks that will make you interesting to others.
Here are some tips to allow the weirdness within you to come out to play:
Stop aiming for generic fitting in
Learn to be comfortable with the idea of other people truly knowing who you are
Share your thoughts, feelings, and likes that are unique
Stop being judgemental towards other people who showcase their “weirdness.”
Push through your comfort zone
Have fun in your everyday life
Try new things that scare you
6. PURSUE YOUR INTERESTS
Sometimes, we ignore the things we are interested in because we feel that we are too busy, or because we fear poor performance at these interests. But pursuing them can make you so much more enjoyable. Becoming good at a unique hobby makes you a more fascinating and complex person automatically.
On top of that, having positive thinking and being passionate about something you like is inherently attractive by default. Ever listened to someone happily talk about the things they love? It’s exhilarating to watch them, and the topic they’re discussing is often something you’re eager to know more about because of how infectious their energy is.
You can pursue whatever passion you like – but pursue it with all your heart, no matter what it is! Whether you’re learning a new art, enjoying a new show, or taking a new class, make sure you’re enjoying what you’re doing!
7. HAVE NEW EXPERIENCES
One of the easiest ways to gain new experiences, aside from learning new skills (which we talked about earlier), is to widen your usual social circle. Your friends are great, but they’re likely the same ones you’ve had for a while. The company you keep will influence your overall personality, so surround yourself with interesting people.
To be interesting, you have to be exposed to different perspectives regularly. Given the fact that many of your friends likely have a lot in common with you, you probably don’t hear diverse opinions, participate in varied group activities, or do anything out of your comfort zone.
Work on branching out and hanging out with a wide range of different people from all walks of life. You’ll expose your mind to so many new thoughts, values, and ideas. And even if you don’t agree with them, you’ll come away with an understanding of where their opinions stem from.
Traveling can also have a similar effect, as it exposes you to different cultures and their respective values and perspectives. You don’t have to burn through your wallet to travel, so keep your positive thinking. A local road trip alone can give you experiences to talk about, and lots of new information to add to your arsenal of knowledge.
FINAL THOUGHTS ON BECOMING MORE INTERESTING
It is valid to want to be interesting. You want others to like you and enjoy speaking to you, and you want to feel like you have something to offer to the world. As such, you can take steps to become more interesting to those around you.
But remember, the person you are right now is valuable and unique in its way, so don’t change yourself to be interesting! Instead, move towards self-improvement, and the interest will come naturally.